Amnesia
by Robbiekaylover333
Summary: The summary is in the first chapter because it was too long to be put in here. Roger/Simon.
1. Chapter 1

**Summary - The only thing existing from Simon's memory was the water, and the pain of it clogging up his lungs. When he first woke up on the hospital bed, that was all he was left with. Simon keeps his memory loss a secret to avoid unnecessary attention until Roger, a former boyfriend of his, notices him acting strangely at times. After it became clear to him that Simon was experiencing memory loss, he helps him bring them back and in the mean time, tries to recover his lost feelings for him. However, when Simon starts to find attraction in another man, Roger finds himself changing into a side of him that he got rid of when he first fell in love with him. As they learn more and more about Simon's past, they fall closer and closer to something that the old Simon never plotted to expose himself.  
**

- Simon POV

All I remembered was the water. But everything before and after that was a loss to my memory. The remembrance of it was painful, and no matter how hard I tried, I never seemed to understand why.

When you wake up on a hospital bed with no understanding of how you got there or who you are, you are of no control. Curiosity is. And when I first woke up on that hospital bed, remembering only the pain of water clogging up my lungs, everything was no longer of my understanding.

The first thing I opened my eyes to in this new set of mind was a boy standing against the border of the doorway. He leaned against it with his arms crossed tightly, and scowled roughly at what seemed to be nothing.

I slowly sat up while enduring the sharp lightheadedness and pain it exposed to my back, and when the boy heard the faint sound of my mattress creaking, he looked to me with wide eyes.

I made no sudden moves, and locked eye contact with him.

He slowly pushed himself off from against the doorway, and tried to focus his sight on only me. "Simon?" he said with a tone of hesitant curiosity.

_Simon_, I thought, _Is that my name? Simon?_

He sighed roughly in relief then rushed towards my bed. Without another thought, he wrapped his arms tightly around my body and rested his chin on my shoulder. He breathed as if trying to control the wild pace of his excitement. At the same time, he breathed in my scent and hugged me even tighter.

"You're finally awake," he said with a raspy voice.

There was something about his voice that made my heart stop. What was it? I felt his shaggy black hair tickle my face. It looked completely of place, as if he was too in stress to even care about how it looked. But I didn't think nor care to say anything. He slowly pulled away and looked deeply into my eyes. For a while he just examined me then raised an eyebrow.

"How are you?" he asked curiously rather than sincerely.

_He was British_, I thought. _Was I British? _

I looked down at my body and hands as if it would help conclude my answer. Without thinking, I struggled to carry my legs over to the side of the bed. All of a sudden, my head started swinging around, and I couldn't hold control of my body for long. The boy hurriedly pushed my back onto the bed and placed a blanket on top of me.

"You're not in perfect condition," he said rushed. "The doctors still need to take a few more tests but it's just to make sure you're healthy and that there's nothing wrong with your body." his eyes widened for a second then he looked away. "They said you were in the water for nearly half an hour," he said quietly.

I winced at the little memory of severe pain that the boy brought back to me.

_Of all memories,_ I thought.

I faced him again, but didn't make exact eye contact.

"My back feels knotted, and I feel a little dizzy," I say, trying to get my mind of the water. My voice sounded disturbingly sour and crackled, and I coughed at the tickling feeling that creeped into my throat.

"I'll get you some water," said the boy. "But you probably just need a little more rest."

My mind was blank for ways to respond. Instead I just stared, unknowingly, into the boys deep grey eyes. For a moment I found it unstrange to just simply look at him for no reason, until he tilted his head at me.

"You have got to quit spacing out," he said while sighing and shaking his head. But then he smirked. "I guess ill just have to wake you up then."

Those words never added up to what I strongly expected to happen next. While I assumed he meant grabbing me a glass of tea or hot chocolate, he cupped my cheeks and bent down to kiss me. It was a gentle kiss, but I didn't take the time to analyze it. Instead, my body was no longer intact as I was trying to process the event that was occurring right now. My eyes were opened wide while his were closed shut. I hadn't made the right intention by doing so because once he opened his eyes, he eyed me confusingly.

"Simon?" he asked. "Are you okay?"

_You just kissed me_, I thought, _This boy,whom I don't even know the name of...just kissed me._

It was at that single second that I had to make a decision. If doctors knew about my amnesia, they would probably have to take more tests and put me into special classes. I didn't want to have to spend time in therapy while sharing every memory I came along to. It was no option in my book.

I gave the tiniest smile to the boy and said, "It hurts to move anything right now. Even as I'm talking."

He laughed half-heartedly. "Well then you should really get some rest. Despite the fact that you've been out for 4 days. But don't worry, I'll still be here when you wake up." He starts backing away into a chair, and for reasons unknown, stared at me.

I quickly look away and close my eyes. Surprisingly, his stare wasn't the kind that burned like of a guy who just found out you cheated on him. It was more like sunrise peeping up onto your

skin for the first time after hibernating in a closed-in cave. Or it was like a warm protective blacket. Either way, it was warm, and although I thought to have it bother me through my attempt to sleep, it didn't. Even when that was true, I still never got to the point where I was dying for rest. Thoughts surrounded my head, and they all connected to basic curiosities of what I'm assuming an average amnesiac person would have.

_What's my last name?_

_Who is this guy?_

_Wh_a_t's my favorite color?_

_Who are my best friends?_

After nearly an hour of endless wonders, I hear the sound of a door open. I kept my eyes shut tightly.

"Roger?" questioned a lady.

"Mrs. Mercy," said the same British boy.

_Roger_, I thought, _His name is Roger_.

"I got your text," the lady said breathlessly. "Did he wake up?"

"Just an hour ago," Roger replied. "he's sleeping now."

I hear footsteps clank against the marble tiles of the hospital room. They sounded like they were getting closer and closer to me. Suddenly I felt a hand cradle the side of my face. I made no sudden movements. I was a bit shocked to feel the texture of moist lips kissing my forehead, but that didn't connect to any follow-up actions.

When the lips pulled away, the lady said, "I'm just glad to know he's alright."

"He's still a bit light headed," said Roger. "But it's a normal symptom to have so there's nothing to worry about."

"Yes, and thank you Roger for taking care of him. You've been quite a big help through all of this and it means a lot. Especially when Simon isn't the only child I have to worry about."

_Is this lady my mother? Does that mean my last name is Mercy?_

"It's no problem Mrs. Mercy," said Roger modestly. "I understand. Plus being in school was no option for me. I've been a total and complete wreck just worrying about him, and I can't afford to attend school with him so much on my mind."

"Well, now that you know he's better, you should probably get back to school," said the lady, who I assumed was my mom. "You also can't afford to miss another test, now can you?"

"I can't," said Roger. "I promised Simon I'd be here when he wakes up."

My mother sighed. "Well I guess that can't be helped. Thank you again, Roger."

"It's really no problem, Mrs. Mercy," replied Roger.

I heard the sound of footsteps, followed-up by the creaking sound of a door opening and

closing. I wasn't sure of who had just walked out, but that wasn't on my mind right now.

_My name is Simon Mercy. I drowned in a water accident, and now I have amnesia._

And that was all I knew.

(Credit to _PaperKites)


	2. Suspicion

- Simon POV

Everything was still so blank to me. The very little things I knew weren't helpful enough for me to get rid of all the wondrous thoughts I had in my head.

It had been a day since I first woke up from my deep sleep. My mother came in again when I was awake, and we talked. I can't say it was bearably easy to keep up with the conversation. At times when I had no thoughts on what to say, I would just smile, laugh, or shrug. Overall, I was able to make it through, and she soon left to go home.

Throughout our conversation, I learned a few more things:

1)I have a 4 year old sister named Alice

2)My father left the country to pursue his dream of being a journalist

3) I am 17 years of age

4) I have a teacher named Mr. Dayne who cares more about missing work than my injuries.

And lastly - 5)I have a boyfriend named Roger Dallas

Despite the boringness I've cause him, Roger never seemed to left me. He always stayed sitting in his chair across from my bed, and when he wanted food, he'd order room service. No matter the difficulty, not once did he leave the room. The thought of him being my boyfriend was a bit unbearable. It wasn't that I didn't like him, because he's already given me the impression of a caring guy. But just as my memories of him were lost, so were the feelings. I was also bothered by the fact that although he loved me, he loved me for who I was before the amnesia. How I am now is probably not who I was before.

It was still a lot to think about. The thought of me having to spend the rest of my life adding up the little details that can calculate my memories without anyone's knowledge was a little too much to handle. But it was worth having to not take up all the special classes amnesiac people were normally given.

After the doctors told me I was good to go, my mother set Roger to drive me home. As much as I wished to protest that, she already seemed to be in much stress, so I settled. As I stared out the large window of my hospital room, I checked my cellphone. It was a white iPhone with a dark blue case saying _Night is Where Our Minds Wander_. When I turned it on, nearly over a hundred messages popped up.

_Simon are u okay?!_

_Call me when you see this!_

_I heard about what happened. Feel better :(_

_I'm literally balling. Please don't die!_

I sighed. _If only I knew who these people were,_I thought.

"Are you spacing out again?" Asked someone from behind me.

I turned around and saw Roger leaning against the doorway. He pushed himself off and started walking towards me.

I quickly turned around, not willing to look him in the eye. I was still in shock from the last time we kissed.

"Um.." I muttered. "I was just looking through all my messages."

I felt him looking over my shoulder and staring onto the screen of my phone. He chuckled quietly. "You've got a lot of people caring for you."

I stayed silent. I never knew how to keep up a conversation with him.

"Have you taken your medications yet?" Roger asked.

"Uh.." I shook my head.

"How do you forget something you take every day?" He said with a sigh. I heard the sound of pills scattering around in a container before seeing Roger hand held out in front of me. Two orange pills sat at his palms. "Here," he said.

I took the pills from out of his hand and grabbed a half-filled glass of water that sat on a table. I quickly swallowed the two pills and chugged down whatever water that was left in the glass. To my surprise, I was eager for hydration. When I placed the glass down on the table, I stared back at the window.

It was still early in the morning, so the sky was dark, and I was able to see my reflection. My natural tan skin glowed faintly within the little light that radiated from a single lamp, sitting on a bedside table. Behind me, I was able to see Roger, staring into my back. He was eyeing me. Looking lower, I saw his hand starting to reach out for mine.

"We should go," I say a little rushed. I started turning around, but hid my face behind the little hairs that dangled from my head.

"Wait," Roger said. He grabbed my wrist and before I knew it, I fell back into his hard chest where I was enveloped tightly in his arms. I lightly tried to pull away, making sure I wasn't making it obvious that I was trying to escape, but his arms were stronger than me. His forehead nestled at the top of my head as he said, "There's no need to rush. We still have a long time before you're dued to go home."

"But what about my sister?" I asked. According to my mother, she was left home alone without anyone to take care of her.

"Since when did you care about her?"

"Don't I always?"

"Not from what I remember," Roger replied slowly as if suspiciously.

"Well I do now. So we should go."

I managed to free myself from his embrace until he grabbed my wrist and entwined my fingers with his. He pulled my hand closer to him, and I was pulled up against his chest. His other arm wrapped securely around my waist, and I was trapped.

"There's something bothering you," He said while looking me concentratedly in the eye. "Tell me."

My heart stopped for a second, then it raced. My mind wandered for answers, but there wasn't a clue in my mind of how to respond.

When I didn't answer, Roger said, "I'm not letting go until you answer."

I looked down at my feet. "It's... Nothing."

Roger squinted his eyes. "Did I do something to you? You've been acting strange since you woke up. What is it?"

"If I said nothing before, I'll say nothing now," I said as assuringly as I could. "There's nothing going on."

Roger held on to me for a little longer before pulling away his arm from my waist. He dropped our still-entwined hands from out of the air and let them dangle. When I looked up to face him, he looked down, avoiding eye contact with me.

"I'm sorry," he said.

"It's fine," I said. "I know I've been acting strange but it's nothing. Really."

Although he was still facing the ground, his eyes looked up at me and he grinned. "You're always strange." I had a second of surprise when he rubbed the top of my head and messed up my hair. He laughed as I tried to put it back in place. "Are you ready to go?"

I was still for a moment before nodding my head. He smiled and pulled my hand while leading me out the door.

"Where would you like to eat?" Roger asked while driving.

To excuse myself from having to figure out what restaurants were available, I replied by saying, "I think I'd rather just go home."

"Aren't you hungry?"

"Isn't there food at home?" I asked.

Roger took a second to glance at me then looked back at the road. "Uh. Well I'm sure there is but.. don't your parents normally have you eat breakfast at a restaurant? Plus, a little bit of alone time wouldn't hurt us during the process." he winks at me.

I closed my eyes, annoyed with myself for making such a careless mistake. I opened them then shrugged. "I guess. You can choose which restaurant to go to."

Robbie raised an eyebrow and grinned. "How unlikely considerate of you."

I stared at him confusingly. When he noticed me looking at him, he laughed. "I mean I'm grateful for your consideration."

Even when I was still confused, I took his sarcasm without questioning.

"So where to?" I asked.

"Hmm," he hums. "Lucky you because I'm in the mood for burgers."

I look at him. "How does that make me lucky?"

Roger stays silent for a moment. His eyebrows furrow as he starts talking slowly. "You told me burgers were your favorite food.. Didn't you?"

Quickly, I turned to face the window and avoided any eye contact with Robbie. "Yeah," I stutter. "Nevermind."

The car came to a stop at a red light and Roger turned to me. "Are you sure there's nothing wrong?" He asked. "Do you want me to take you back to the hospital?"

My eyes widened. I waved my hands and shook my head as a way of denying his offer. "No, don't take me back. Please. I'm fine. I promise."

"But I can't rub off the feeling that you're-"

"I'm fine!" I say a little louder.

Roger winced at the sudden tone of my voice, then didn't respond as the red light turned green. I expected him to say something, but not once did he say another word for the whole drive. It hasn't even been two days, and I've already made countless of suspicious mistakes.

As I looked out the window, I could see his reflection. His face was focused on the road, but his eyes scowled, as if focusing on something other than that. I stared at him for a while wondering, _How can I spend the rest of my life pretending to love him?_

Unintentionally, I sighed deeply and closed my eyes. When I opened them again, I saw Roger looking at me through the reflection in the window. I didn't look away even when my mind ordered me to. There's something about his stare that always felt mesmerizing, and I couldn't seem to put a finger on it. When I realized we were staring at each other for a long time, I noticed he wasn't looking at the road anymore. I refocused my vision away from his reflection and stared outside the car.

We were at McDonald's.

I turned to look at him, but he continued to stare at me immensely. I forced a smile on my face and asked, "Shall we go?"

Roger shook himself out of it, then walked out the door without replying. I expected him to walk around the car and open the door for me, but he stood in front of the car and waited for me to come out myself. I walked out the car and followed him inside the restaurant. As I did, I swear I saw him glare at me through the glass window on the door.


	3. Mcdonalds

- Roger POV

During the time that Simon was in the hospital, I became desperate for his presence. Even when I was always there next to him, he wasn't there next to me. He was there, but his accompaniment wasn't. I remember the need and tears I forced to hold back but never when there was a 99% chance of him coming back, there was that little 1% that opposed it. It was still a possibility, and it haunted me for all of four days.

But when he woke up in front of me, and I saw the gentle wonder of his eyes looking into mine, no emotion was able to be put into words. He was there. He had awoken. And he looked at me.

But that was what bothered me. The wonderment in his eyes when he first saw me was indescribable. It wasn't the lovable kind of wonder I would always see from him, but a wonder that made me feel the need to be cautious.

I forced myself to believe that it was just him waking up from a four day slumber. But as time went by, that became impossible. My eyes didn't deceive me. There was something about him that's changed, and it was no interest of mine to just let it slide and believe that it was a phase.

I walked into McDonald's ahead of him to avoid from letting him see the expression on my face -suspicion and curiosity. If this had all really been just a phase, Simon would've hated to know that I was jumping to conclusions even after he's told me otherwise.

When I walked up to the counter, I knew that in no time, Simon would walk up beside me and possibly stare into my face at one point. I inhaled calmly, and attempted to put on a normal face that expressed my happiness due to hanging out with my boyfriend for the first time in ages. Soon enough, Simon stepped up beside me and looked up at me.

"What would you like?" I asked gently.

His nose twitched. I smiled, knowing that it meant he was deep in thought. _At least that's one thing that seems normal._

"I'm not really in the mood for burgers," he soon replied.

I squint my eyes and raise an eyebrow at him. "You're always in the mood for burgers."

His eyes widened as if suddenly realizing something. Then he hid his face behind the hairs that dangled from his head. "People change," he said.

I meant to say something back, but held it in. Instead I looked up at the menu and stared at the cash register lady. "One big mac please," I said. After she typed in my order, I looked to SImon. "Do you still want to order something?"

He shrugged. "I'll get a cheeseburger, I guess."

I stared at him for a moment before repeating his order to the cash register lady and added two white chocolate mochas. After our order was checked in, we waited for our number to be called. Meanwhile, we sat at a table with chairs so we were able to face each other.

As Simon checked his phone, I studied him. He was still the same person. He was still Simon. And he was still beautiful. What wasn't still was something I've longed to identify since the minute he woke up.I noticed him look up at me and he gave me a confused look. I simply smiled.

"What are you doing, love?" I asked.

He shrugged. "I'm trying to respond to everyone's text messages, but there's just so many."

I laughed and took the phone from out of his hands. "Here," I said. "Just write a simple text message and forward it to everyone."

I typed in _Heyy, its Simon! I'm finally out of the hospital so there's no need to worr_y.I showed the message to him before forwarding it all his contacts. He nodded, but I knew he didn't care much about what it said. After sending the message to all his friends, I handed the phone back.

"Thanks," he said.

I smiled at him. "So where do you want to go after this?"

His lips shifted to one side. "I really think I should go home and rest."

"Are you sure?"

He nodded. "I'm still a bit lightheaded, and I really think rest would be the best medicine."

I chuckled and reached for his hand. "I was really actually hoping to spend more time with you. Especially since we still haven't discussed our fight before the accident. But if that's what you want, I'll settle."

There it was again. The same look of wonderment in his brown eyes that made me feel cautious for reasons unknown.

"One cheeseburger, one big mac, and two white chocolate mochas!" Called someone from the kitchen.

"I'll get it," Simon offered. I gave him a nod before he stood up from his seat and started walking over to the counter.

While he did I stared at her in an, unintentionally, observant way. There were times when I felt like he was just normal. But then there were other times when I denied myself of that thought.

He soon walked back with a tray filled with our orders, and sat back down in her seat. We both picked up our white chocolate mochas, and I clanked them together.

"Cheers," I said. Simon looked at me a bit surprised, but I let it slide. We both took a sip of our coffee and began eating our burgers.

When Simon took his first bite, I noticed a sharp look on his face that looked disgusted. I raised an eyebrow.

"Something wrong love?" I asked.

He wiped his mouth and shook his head. He slowly put the burger down and took another sip of his coffee. When he put the coffee down, he stared mindlessly at his burger.

"How's the burger?" I asked.

He looked up at me then back to the burger. "It's a bit too... cheesy."

I chuckled half-heartedly. "It is a _cheese_burger after all."

He looked away shamefully. "I know, but..." he trailed off.

I sighed and switch his cheeseburger with my big mac. "Here. I specifically asked for no cheese In mine."

Simon gave off a little smile and shyly took a bite out of the big mac. Again, a sharp look molded into his face and he put the burger down.

"It's..." he said. "Too much."

I look away from him. It was already a lot to think about. I didn't know how to put my thoughts into words, or how to explain my confusion to him. Instead I exhaled sharply and said. "I don't understand, Simon."

He remained silent.

"I don't know exactly what I don't understand but.." I slowly turned my eyes towards him. "I'm at a jumble of thoughts, right now."

His eyes widened and he looked away. "Not everything deserves reasoning."

That's when I knew.


	4. Anniversary

Chapter 4 - Simon

_- My best friends' names are Emily and Sierra_

_- I play the piano_

_- I love burgers_

_- I'm allergic to nuts_

- _I'm a lover for nature_

_- I was a dancer until I broke my leg and quitted._

_- I enjoy stargazing on the roof_

And -_ Roger is my next door neighbor_

So far, I have written down a short list in a journal my father sent me while I was in the hospital. It was filled with things I've come across that linked to my past before the amnesia hit. Again, they weren't enough to trigger back any memories, but they were still good to keep in mind.

I wrote down a few more facts before putting the journal down on my bedside table and laying back down on my bed to stare at the stars hanging down from my ceiling.

My mom said I was in need of new decorations, but with my memory loss and all, it wasn't necessary to change anything. Everything that lied around in my room was a representation of who I was.

Nearly everything in my room was blue. The walls were dark blue. My lamp was dark blue. My bed sheets and blanket were white, but blue patterns of leaves and vines scattered decoratively on them. Although it was only an assumption, it seemed quite clear that blue was definitely an interest of mine. But just as blue reminded me of the night sky, it also reminded me of water.

My eyes widened and I gasped for second. I still the remembered the feeling; the desperation for air. It was all too much so I placed my hands over my eyes and took deep breaths.

I took a second to look at my alarm clock.

_6:32 AM._

Nearly a week has passed since I woke up, and according to my doctor, I was healthy as a horse and steady enough to attend school again. It was normal to be nervous, but being amnesiac triples the nerve in my system.

My mom said to be ready at 7 if I wanted a ride to school. If not, I would have to rely on Roger, and she didn't want to put that stress on him. I agreed with her, but not for the same reason.

Ever since our "date" at McDonald's, I've made millions of excuses to never see him again. To my surprise, Roger took them quite understandingly and didn't bother to fight. As grateful as I was for that, I knew I would have to face him sooner or later. And sooner would be the correct option since we're attending the same school with nearly the same exact schedules.

I took a deep breath before crawling out of bed to get ready for school. But even through my preparations, I still had a lot on my mind.

Roger was suspicious of me. I knew he was. As time went by, however, he seemed to have drift apart from that thought and turned accepting of my strange behavior. But the acceptance was so sudden, it was like we were switching our thoughts. Now I was the one being suspicious. How can he just let everything slide so quickly?

My house was overwhelmingly big, and I was having difficulties with finding my way around. Last night, I spent 20 minutes trying to find the bathroom and nearly got caught by-

"Good morning Simon!"

I was just about to enter the kitchen when Alice started skipping her way ahead of me. Her curly blonde hair tickled my hands as she skipped pass me.

"Good morning," I said.

I continued to walk in, and found my mother preparing a well thought out meal on the dining table.

"Simon," She said when she first saw me. "You're awake. I just finished preparing breakfast. It's your favorite." She smiled lovingly at me.

I smiled back, but I knew it didn't touch my eyes. I sat in a chair and looked at the plate before me. There were two pieces of toasts, smothered in a delightful amount of nutella, topped with half-sliced strawberries. My mouth-watered at just the sight of it.

-_My favorite breakfast meal is nutella covered toasts with strawberry sliced toppings._

"But hurry," mom said, "I need to be at the office a little earlier today, and I cant afford to miss anymore hours."

I nodded and quickly yet mannerly stuffed the food into my mouth. Although I didn't take much time to savor the flavor, I knew it was delicious. The strawberries gave out a burst of flavor and tasted sweetly against the nutella covered toast. I washed it all down with a glass of milk and soon enough, I was done.

I wiped my mouth before standing up from my chair. "I'm ready," I said.

Mom nodded and quickly grabbed her bag, coat, and keys. She rushed in her 2 inch heels out the door, leaving me to catch up with her. Right when I was about to walk after her, Alice tapped me on the arm. I looked down to her tiny little body and saw she was holding a black backpack.

"You forgot your backpack!" she said cheerfully.

I smiled at her and took the backpack out from her hands. "Thank you, Alice," I said softly. I stood up and began walking out, closer the door behind me. Before I did, I could hear the sounds of Alice yelling goodbye.

When I made it inside the car, my mom's phone started to ring.

"I have to take this," she mouthed. I nodded at her and she put the phone to her ear. "Hello June...Yes...Yes I know...Okay let me just check..."

I looked around the neighborhood, looking at the different designs of houses. Every building was of it's own structure and style. It seemed that our house was one of the most exquisite looking ones due to it's vintage outlook and beautiful gardening.

Then I looked to Roger's house. His house looked a little like mines, only a little larger. It wasn't as decorative, but it was undeniably large. Yet, somehow, I looked down upon it.

I soon looked away and decided to check my phone. According to some of my friends, I was now the social hub of the whole school. Aftermath-wise, now my phone was bombing with calls and text messages from people that weren't even in my contacts. All night, my phone rang and vibrated, and it soon became the root to my insomnia. After having enough of it, I finally decided to turn it off. Mom said it would cool off soon, but it had already been a week and I was still the center of attention. And although many people asked to come over and visit me, I was thankful for the fact that my doctor recommended I took more time to rest than hang out with friends.

Suddenly, my mom tapped me on the shoulder. I looked to her and she pointed out the window with her free hand, still calling on the phone. I followed her finger and saw where she was pointing.

It was Roger's house. But not just his house - Roger himself.

Roger walked out of his house with a backpack dangling over one shoulder, wrinkling his grey T-Shirt. One hand was stored within one of his pockets and moving around as if searching for something while the other hand held a phone to his ear. He walked down his porch steps, causing his backpack to bounce against his back, and his hair moved elegantly against the light morning breeze.

My heart pounded at the guilt I felt inside. He deserved to know that the person he loved was no longer a part of me, but lost somewhere where I had no luck finding. I couldn't bear the thought of him never truly knowing, but I also couldn't bear the thought of breaking his heart.

He stood at the door of his car with his phone still attatched to his ear. Even over the sound of my mother talking, I could hear his voice lightly seeping through the car window. His accent was faint to my ears but in some ways, it was still mesmerizing to hear.

Soon he pulled his phone away from his ears and held it in front of his face. His eyebrows furrowed as if he was concentrated on the screen. After a few seconds, they settled and he looked up. Before I could turn away, his eyes locked with mines. To avoid suspicion, I didn't turn away. I simply stared at him for as long as he stared at me. His eyes were a little widened as if he were surprised.

I jumped when I heard the sudden sound of my car engine roaring beneath my seat. I looked to my mom and saw her starting to pull out of the driveway.

"Sorry about that, hun," she apologized. "I had to take care of something real quick."

"It's.." I turned back to Roger. His eyes were still on me. "Fine," I breathed.

"Aw, don't worry," mom said when she noticed me glancing at him. "You'll see him at school soon."

As the car started down the road, I continued to stare at Roger as he did to me. Then he broke eye contact when he unlocked his car door and stepped inside, leaving me to only wonder.

Dropping me off in front of the school was probably not the best idea. When I first stepped foot out of the car, that's when the chaos began.

"SIMON!" exclaimed someone.

Before I was able to get a look at who it was, a body slammed against me, causing me to almost flail back into the car. Whoever this person was had long curly dark hair and smelled like a combination of cinnamon and vanilla. When she pulled away I was able to see her face. Her cheeks were red with excitement.

"I thought I'd never see you again!" she said.

"Hello Sierra," said my mom from behind me.

_Sierra. Is this the same Sierra I mentioned in my journal?_

Sierra tilted her body to the side so she could see my mom. "Hi Mrs. Mercy," she said with a wave. "How are you?"

"I'm doing great," mom replied. "Simon, will you be okay?"

I turned to face her and said, "Yes mom."

"Alright. Well call me if you need anything." I could hear the worriedness blend into her voice. "I'll be picking you up at 2. Bye now!"

I waved her goodbye and turned back around. When my eyes searched only for Sierra, unexpectedly, 7 more people stood before me. By the time I faced them, almost everyone jumped at me and wrapped their arms tightly around me. My ears burned from the sound of squealing coming from other people.

"I missed you so much!"

"Simon your back!"

"God I've been worried sick."

"Don't scare me like that!"

"Girl why haven't you called me back?!"

Already I felt the pressure I hoped to avoid, and the light-headedness I just recently recovered from was starting to return.

"Guys, guys!" yelled Sierra as she pushed herself through the crowd. "Give him some room here, people."

When she finally made her way to me, she gave a big smile. "You have no idea how glad I am to see you!"

I attempted to fake a smile. "As I am with you." Then a thought came to me. "Hey," I said. "Where's Emily?"

Sierra's cheeriness downed. "Oh Em," she said in a worried tone while shaking her head. "She hasn't talked to anyone since she heard about the accident. I tried helping her get through it but..." she sighed. "You know, with her dad and everything, things aren't exactly peachy with her."

I tried to look as understanding as I could. Now I hoped more than ever to retrieve my memories back because at this point, my sympathy was needed.

"Is she here at school?" I asked.

Sierra looked down and shrugged. "She's been on and off about school. I'm sure she's got your text messages but she just hasn't seen them because her phone was taken away due to bad grades."

Soon the bell rang, and everyone started running inside. Sierra waited beside me.

"Wanna walk to class together?" she asked.

I opened my mouth, ready to answer in agreement, when an arm snaked around my waist. I noticed the surprised look on Sierra's face before I finally turned around to see who it was. My heart skipped a beat when I saw who it was.

Roger.

"If you don't mind, Sierra," he said, "I would like to walk with him."

I stared at Sierra with wide eyes, trying to send her a message of denying his offer. Even when she didn't look at me, she shook her head. "Sorry Roger, but he's mine today." I tried to hide the smile that was starting to spread across my face.

I was about to walk towards Sierra when Roger tugged me back. "Please, Sierra? It's really important."

I tucked in my lips and looked to Sierra nervously.

"Can't it wait until after school?" Sierra asked. "You do live like right next to each other."

"It's really important," Roger repeated, exaggerating "really".

Sierra sighed and rolled her eyes before turning away. "Fine, fine. Have fun lovebirds."

My heart was already racing as she started to walk away. Roger unwrapped his arms around my waist and stepped in front of me with one eyebrow was raised.

"So what do you want to do today?" he asked.

I looked at him confusingly. "What about school?"

He laughed and held both of my hands. "I mean later today."

I was about to say something when someone yelled from by the school entrance, "Get to class kids!"

I walked around Roger and shook my head. "We have to get to class." Before I made it 3 feet, Roger reached out for my hand and stopped me.

"You..forgot. Haven't you," Roger said, phrasing it in a way that wasn't even a question.

My heart stopped. Although my body was facing away, my head turned to him. I knew I looked nervous, but I didn't say anything. Roger sighed and looked away from me while being deep in thought.

_Does he know?_

As he turned his head back, he said, "It's our one year anniversary."

My body shot up and I felt my hands grip on his. I felt the need to run away, but I couldn't risk any more of his suspicion. At the same time, I was paralyzed, and my legs vibrated through the nerves.

_A one year anniversary, _I thought, _That's something no person would ever forget._

I turned my body so that I was facing him completely, but my eyes wandered down to the side. "Oh," I said quietly. "I... I'm sorry. I forgot."

Roger inhaled sharply and his hands gripped on mines as well. It was silent for a good few seconds. I refused to look him in the eye, but I knew he was already looking at me. This wasn't the same warm comforting stare I felt on my hospital bed. This time, it burned. It might've just been the heat circulating throughout my body but nonetheless, it burn. I didn't know what to do next. All I thought to do was apologize and even after that, I couldn't shake off the guilty feeling inside.

I pulled my hand from his and fisted it close to my chest. Still looking away from him I said, "We're going to be late for class." then began walking away from him. Half-expecting him to grab my hand and pull me back to him to confront me, he didn't. Instead what he did was far worse.

Just when I was about to enter the building, Roger yelled after me, "Just so you know, we've only been dating for three months."

That's when I ran.


	5. Now He Knows

Chapter 5 - Simon

Roger knew. Roger figured it out. He outsmarted me. And there was nothing I could do. I ran into the school, not knowing where to go. I just knew I had get away from Roger. Luckily I found someone named Adela who was thrilled to see me and casually walked me to first period - Trigonometry. Unluckily, Roger just so happened to be in the same class.

I knew he stared at me, but I had no intentions of staring at him. Although it was quite tempting. His eyeballs were frighteningly compelling, but I resisted. And as many times as he tried to make contact with me, I always found a way to get out of it.

It was like that through the whole day. I found myself following people who came across me and squealed at the sight of me being there. It all seemed repetitive but the process worked.

At lunch, I had to stay in class so I could make up some missing work. It would seem I'm spending the rest of the week making up missing work. But I was just relieved to know I was avoiding Roger as much as possible. After school was when my hopes defied me.

I waited outside of the building, searching for my mom's silver car to pass by so I could go home. 20 minutes passed since school ended and 6 people, including me, were still waiting for their parents to come. From what I remember, it took only 10 minutes to drive to school. So what was taking so long?

I pulled my phone from out of my back pocket and called my mom. After 6 rings, someone from the other end said, "Hello?"

"Mom?" I asked.

"OH is this Kina's son?"

"Yes," I replied. "Is my mother available?"

"She was called in for a meeting last minute," she answered. "She told me to tell you that she won't be able to pick you up so you could ask for someone else to give you a ride."

"Who?" I asked slowly.

"Forgive me if I'm wrong, but Rob? Robin? I forgot. I know it has R in it."

My hands fisted around the phone as I inhaled sharply. "Roger?" I asked.

"Yes! Yes, Roger!" exclaimed the lady. "Sorry hun. I have to go. Have a nice day. Goodbye."

The line ended, and I slowly lowered the phone from my ear. _I couldn't have Roger drive me home. No. That is definitely out of the question. But who else could give me a ride?_

I looked around then stopped when I realized it was pointless. I knew no one, so of course I wouldn't randomly find someone to offer me a ride. Then I realized, shouldn't Roger have left to go home already? Aside from the fact that I have no intentions of seeing him, I still needed him to get back home. But I couldn't rely on him. I couldn't stay in a car for 10 minutes with him, shaking and stuttering the whole way. It wasn't-

"Why are you still here?"

My heart froze. My body became paralyzed. But my legs felt like jello, and they were going to let down any minute now. I could feel Roger's presence. It was like the weight of a swinging tire was about to hit me but it never did. I hated that I never knew exactly what to do around him. It was worse now I knew what he knows.

I took a deep breath and exhaled. "No reason," I replied. "I just like to be alone."

"You don't have a ride," Roger said in a monotone voice

"I have a ride," I said defensively, still facing away from him. "They're just.. not here yet."

"You're mom does this all the time," he informed. "Come on. I'll give you a ride home." I can sense his hands starting to reach out to me but quickly, I turned around to face him.

"I'll just walk home," I said before walking into the parking lot.

Roger yelled after me, "But you don't know where to go, do you?"

I stopped in the middle of the parking lot. My hands fisted so hard it felt like my nails were digging into my skin, and were going to tear it apart any time soon. I stayed silent.

"You don't have to hide it from me," He said. "I already know everything."

"You don't know the half of it," I muttered while looking down at my feet.

"What?" he asked, barely hearing what I just said.

My head looked up and my lips tucked into my mouth. "Nothing." I started to continue walking.

Roger sighed. "I guess I'll walk you home then."

"Please don't," I say while still walking. I could hear the sounds of his feet dragging against the concrete.

"That's not your choice. I'm protecting you whether you like it or not."

"I'm not going to get kidnapped."

"Well, then you've obviously forgotten the dangers of this town."

"I'll find a way to defend myself." Now I was angry.

"And in case that backfires?"

"It won't."

"_If _it does?"

"Well then I'll be sure to call for anyone except you."

Suddenly I felt his hands wrapped tightly around my wrist. I winced at the suddenness of his action and became desperate for his release.

"Don't, Simon" he said through his clenched teeth.

"Ow, Roger!" I cry. His grip started to become unbearably painful.

He yanked my arm towards him and I gave a little "ow" when his grip unexpectedly became tighter. "Don't shut me out!" he growled. "I want to help you!"

"Roger..please.." I pant.

His eyes widened when he saw the pained look on my face. Immediately, I felt his hands loosen and release. As the cold outdoor breeze surrounded my wrist once again, I held it with my other hand and gasped while backing away. Roger held his hands out in defense.

"Simon.." he said whispered. "I didn't.. I didn't mean it. I don't know what got over me. I'm sorry."

My hands still held my other wrist as I looked up to him, fearfully. "If you wanted to help me," I said so quietly, it could've been a whisper, "you wouldn't have hurt me."

"Please," Roger begged. "Forgive me. Let me see-" he reached out for my hand but I flinched and jumped back. "Simon-"

"No," I say, interrupting him. I didn't know how afraid I looked, but I knew that it didn't matter to him. "Just please, leave me alone."

"Simon.."

"Just go!" I yell.

Roger opened his mouth to say something then closed it. I could see the hurt look in his eyes, and it almost made me regret yelling at him. He was about to turn around and walk away but he stopped. I looked at him confusingly as he furrowed his eyebrows. Then his head turned sharply at me and he began walking towards me.

"No.." I trailed off when Roger gently grabbed my hand and gave a kiss to my wrist. I lost my words and I remained still for about 5 seconds. By then, he pulled his lips away and stared me concentrated in the eye.

"I'm sorry," he said. When I didn't answer, he continued, "I cant leave you to walk alone in the condition you are in. Please, at least let me take you home."

My eyes fell to the side and I inhaled softly. "Okay. I'll go with you."

Roger smiled faintly and led me to his car. The whole way, his hands were fisted into his pockets and looked only in his direction. Not once did he turn to make sure I was really following him.

Once we made it to his red car, he opened the passenger door for me. "Thanks," I said quietly. He responded nothing and waited for me to get inside. As soon as I did, he walked around the car to the driver's seat.

"Please put on your seatbelt," he finally said as he got inside.

I quickly put on my seat belt while he egnited the engine of the car. To my surprise, Roger didn't start a conversation right away. But that's the problem. _'Right away'._ After about 2 minutes, Roger started asking questions.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he asked.

"Hm?" I mumbled while fidgeting with my phone.

"About your amnesia. Why didn't you say anything?"

I took a moment before saying anything. "I couldn't," I replied.

"What do you mean you couldn't?"

"I mean I couldn't risk all the extra attention."

Roger took a second to stare at me then looked back at the road. "How is extra attention such a risk?"

"They take more tests, I have to take special classes, share memories with people, etcetera."

"Does anyone else know about it?"

"Do you always ask this many questions?"

"Just answer me," he said quickly.

I sighed. "No. You're the only one who saw right through me." He shrugged but I could see from the look on his face that he was proud of the accomplishment. I gave him a curious stare. "How did you figure it out?"

"It all started when we first kissed in the hospital," he answered.

"What was wrong with it?" I asked offensively.

Roger gave a light chuckle. "There was nothing wrong with it. You were always a good kisser."

I blushed and hid my face.

"But normally," he continued, "whenever we kiss, you'd either pull away and flip me off or, in the rarer occasion, beat me up."

I flinched my head back and looked at him with astonishment. "Why?"

He laughed and shrugged. "I don't know. That's what made you so interesting."

I smiled at that thought. When I realized I was leaning off I chair, I rested my back against it and relaxed.

"But," Roger added, "what really caught my attention was what you said at McDonalds last week."

I furrow my eyebrows at him. "What did I say?"

At this point, we were at a red light so Roger looked me deeply in the eye. "_Not everything deserves reasoning. _Those were your exact words."

"So?"

"All your life, you've lived by saying _Everything deserves reasoning. Whether it is significant or pointless. _It has been your motto since the moment I met you."

"Oh.." I said quietly. "Well then if you knew about my amnesia, why didn't you say anything?"

"For one, I wasn't 100% sure my theory was correct. Two, going back to your motto, if you chose not to tell me in the first place there has to be a reason, and I couldn't just defy it. But it soon came to the point where I couldn't handle just simply accepting the fact that you wanted to avoid me forever. I had to find a way to help you unintentionally admit the truth. So-"

"You lied about our anniversary, "I said, finishing his sentence.

The traffic light turned green and Roger started driving again. "Yeah," he said with a big smile.

"How rude," I said in an annoyed tone.

"Apologies, love," he said. "I care too much for you."

I looked out the window in embarrassment. I don't know how long I'll be able to handle his presence.

I sighed. "Please don't tell anyone," I begged.

"Why would I?" he asked.

I shook my head. "There are infinite reasons on why you should. But just promise me you won't."

Roger was silent.

"Roger," I said demandingly, turning back to him.

"Shouldn't your parents at least know?"

"You have no right to-"

"I won't tell anyone," Roger interrupted. "I promise. But please just.. just.. don't hide things from me again."

"Roger..."

"Please," Roger said. I could hear the nerves run through his voice. "I can't handle the thought of you doing something I have no clue about. If you ever need someone, no matter the occasion, I want to be there for you. Even if it's as ridiculous as climbing the Eiffel tower, I'll do it. But I just.." his eyes shut tightly and he shook his head. "I can't afford to almost lose you. _Again._ Please Simon. This is all I'm asking of you."

I was silent for a moment then I inhaled. "I won't hide things from you. I promise."

Roger smiled thankfully. I could see his grip on the wheel relax. "Thank you."

A few minutes later, Roger parked his car in his driveway. Knowing this was the time for me to get out, I didn't. I looked at Roger as he stared blankly ahead and the car engine was still roaring beneath me. I don't know how long we sat there without saying a word but soon enough, I grabbed my backpack from the back seat and opened the car door.

Just when I stepped foot on the driveway, Roger said, "Simon wait."

I froze and turned to look at him. He was still staring blankly at the road but once I faced him, he opened the car door and walked out. I watched him walk around the car as his eyes were focused only on me, and his eyebrows were furrowed. When he was about only a foot away from me, he roughly grabbed my face and smacked his lips on to mine. My lips remained still - shocked - as his ate mines with passion and eagerness. No matter what he did, he always left me paralyzed.

Just when I had the gut to push him away, he pulled himself away and dropped his hands to his waist. The look in his eyes was sadness. Betrayal. Sorrow. His eyebrows were no longer furrowed, but they were angled so that inner brows were lifted and the outer ones were drooped. I was about to ask what he was thinking, but he said it before I could.

"You don't love me anymore," he stated with a tone of disbelief. "Do you."

I couldn't answer. Instead, I closed his car door and walked across the lawn that separated his house from mine.

And he didn't even care to stop me.


	6. Ralph

Chapter 6 - Simon

There were millions of thoughts scattered around my head, and I couldn't put any one of them into words.

_I hurt him. I've broken his heart. And now he probably hates me._

When I saw the look on Roger's face after he kissed me, I couldn't help to just walk away. I couldn't bear to look him in the eye. But then I think, _Had I just told him that his theory was wrong and I still had feelings for him, I wouldn't be here, sitting in the library during lunch, thinking about it rather than working on homework._

The publicity in school still hasn't died down. In fact, it has greatly increased and nearly everyone was talking about me; including the adults and teachers.

I didn't see Roger at school today. And I refused to believe that it was just a coincidence.

Emily wasn't at school either. I always think back to my journal where I put down, "My best friends' names are Emily and Sierra." If she was my best friend, I wondered how she was like. I wondered if she was kind. If she was caring. Or if she was depressed. If she had personal problems. However she was, I just wanted to see her.

I shook my head from all my jumbled thoughts and looked down at my trigonometry homework. All this work had to be done in a week or I'd fail the finals, and I didn't intend on putting up with that extra stress and anxiety.

After working through a few problems, the bell rang. I gathered up all my stuff and began walking myself to 6th period, English. The hallways weren't the craziest like how you'd see in movies. In fact, it's probably as empty as any regular school. As I was walking up the stairs, someone tapped me on the shoulder. I looked to my right and saw Sierra looking at me with a big smile.

"Hey!" she said.

"Hey, what's up?" I asked.

"Nothing much, " she replied. "But hey. Are you free after school today?"

I thought about it before saying, "I did plan on spending the rest of the week finishing up all my missing work. But my mom said not to stress myself out and spend some time out of the house so I'm sure I could fit free time into my schedule. Why?"

Sierra laughed. "You're always such a nerd."

I smiled. At least that's one characteristic I got right about myself.

"Anyways, " Sierra continued. "I was wondering if you'd like to visit Em. She hasn't answered to any of us and I know she has a lot of stress with her parents and all, but I thought maybe her seeing you will lighten the mood. I'm not even sure if she knows you've gotten out of the hospital already."

At this point we walked off the stairs and were on the second floor. "I'd definitely like to come," I responded. Not only would I get to meet one of my best friends, but I'd be able to avoid Robbie who was a lawn away from where I lived.

"Great!" cheered Sierra. then she stopped aside to a classroom. "Meet me outside near the parking lot after school. See ya!"

I waved her goodbye and continued walking down the hall. I thought about how to act when I meet Emily. The thought of it made me fearful, but then the thought of avoiding Roger made it worth while.

_One mistake,_ I thought, _I wont make any other mistakes this time. _I took a deep breath to let it all sink in.

I made it to my classroom a few seconds before the bell. As I walked to my desk, I felt a vibration in my pocket. I took out my phone and turned it on to see a text message from my mom. It said, 'I'm been called in for another meeting today so I can't pick you up. Do you have a ride?'

_Of course you do, _I think,_You always have a meeting. _

I continued walking towards my desk as I typed in as a response, 'I'm meeting Emily after school with Sier-'

Someone slammed into me and caused my phone to drop from out of my hands along with all my binders and books. Panicked, I quickly kneel down to the floor and picked up my phone. I exhaled in relief when I saw it wasn't at all cracked.

"I am so sorry Simon!" A guy apologized sincerely. He kneeled down next to me and started helping to pick up all the papers that fell to the floor. I looked at him and saw blushes form on his golden skin, and his blonde hair shining in the radiant electrical light.

"It's.. okay," I said, admiring his beauty.

He looked up at me and smiled as he handed me a few of the papers he picked up. I took them and started helping with picking stuff up. I swear I heard a slight chuckle sneak from out of his mouth.

" , is there a problem?" asked the English teacher, Mr. Bennett.

Before I answered, the boy who slammed into me said, "I accidentally made him drop his stuff."

"Get to your seat Ralph," ordered Mr. Bennett.

"Yes sir," said Ralph. He stood up from the ground and started walking towards his seat. Once he did, he stared at me with worried eyes. This included the rest of the class.

Mr. Bennett clapped his shoes against the tile floor as he walked towards me. "Mr. Mercy, what is that?" he asked, pointing towards the phone in my hands.

"My phone," I replied quietly.

"Mhm, right. And exactly how did Mr. Chase manage to bump into you?"

"I-I-I..." I stuttered. "I was replying to my mom's text and-"

"Mr Mercy you know the rules. No phones in class." Mr. Bennett held out his hands. "Hand it over."

"But I still need to-"

"_Hand_.. it over," He said more demandingly.

I hesitantly handed him my phone and stood up with all my stuff. Mr. Bennett stuffed the phone into one of his pockets and turned away from me.

"Please take a seat, Simon," he said.

I took the only seat that was left which was right behind Hayden. A few people still stared at me but I ignored them.

"Alright class!" said Mr. Bennett. "Looking back to your test scores from the last semester, I have come to the conclusion that.."

Ralph turned around in his chair and mouthed to me, "I'm sorry."

I mouthed back, "It's okay," before he smiled faintly and turned back around in his seat.

The bell rang, signaling for the end of class. I grabbed all my stuff from out of my desk. The whole time, I couldn't keep my mind off my phone. Now that Mr. Bennett has it, I'm in no way able to contact my mom about meeting up with Emily.

When the class emptied except for me and Mr. Bennett, I walked up to him with all my stuff. "Mr. Bennett, I-"

"You will get your phone back by the end of the day," He said. "For now, I will be keeping it safe in my pocket."

"But I need to contact my mom," I said nervously.

"After school, Mr. Mercy," he said with an annoyed tone. "Get to class if you don't want to be late."

I sighed and rolled my eyes while making my way out the door. What is up with him?

2 seconds after I walked out, someone grabbed my shoulder. I turned to my right and saw Ralph looking at me with sorry eyes.

"Hey," he said.

"Hi," I answered awkwardly.

"I wanted to apologize for what I did back there," he said. "Getting you in trouble and all."

I smiled. "You're already forgiven. It mainly my fault for not looking where I was going. I could've bumped into anybody."

"But it wasn't just anybody. It was me." Ralph looked down at the ground as he walked.

"Please don't feel bad. I'm not that affected by it. Plus, I'll be getting my phone back at the end of the day. It's really no biggie."

He looked up at me and smiled. "You're being oddly nice today."

"Aren't I always nice?"

Ralph raised an eyebrow at me. "You're being sarcastic right?"

_Was I some kind of troublemaker or something? _I thought.

I faked a laugh. "Of course I am. But it's good to change from time to time."

He smiled wider. "Well aren't you being an alter ego."

I looked at him weirdly. "Is that a bad thing?"

He grinned and shook his head. "No. I kinda like it."

I smiled back at him and quickly looked away to cover the red spreading across my face. I soon stepped aside to my AP Biology classroom.

"Bye," I said.

"Bye," he said with a wave. "Talk to you later?"

I nodded at him with a smile. "Definitely."

He returned with an even bigger smile before he walked away. Suddenly, I started to feel a strange change occur in my body. It wasn't painful. But it was odd.

_Why is my heart beating so erratically?_

When I started walking into the classroom, I noticed a boy staring at me from his desk in the back corner. His hair was devil red , and his eyes were dark blue and wide as he stared at me with a challenge. Out of confusion, I walked slowly into the classroom with my eyes focused on him. His eyes followed me as I walked towards my desk in the middle of the classroom. Once his stare became uncomfortable, I immediately looked away

The second bell just rang, so the class had just started. But the whole time while I was listening to the Mrs. Thomas, I could swear fireballs were being pelted at me at the back of my head.


	7. Painless Pain

Chapter 7 - Simon

After school, I walked back over to Mr. Bennett's class to retrieve back my cellphone. When I got there, he was still keeping a class in session past the bell so I waited a few minutes before he finally dismissed the class and I was able to walk in.

Mr. Bennett stood behind his table, organizing paperwork while placing them into drawers. People were still walking themselves out so I patiently waited before making my way around desks and chairs to get to Mr. Bennett. I stood on the other side of his table and he didn't seem to notice I was there.

"Mr. Bennett?" I asked. He was still into his papers and didn't respond. "I'm here for my phone."

"Simon," he said while stacking papers. "Yes, wait here a second. "

I patiently waited as he walked over to a metal drawer and unlocked one of his cabinets. In it, I saw my phone lying in a small cardboard box. I stared at it confusingly as he took it out and walked it back over to me.

"Here you go, Mr. Mercy," he said, handing me over the phone.

"Thanks," I said. "Um, why did you have to keep in your drawer?"

"What?" Mr. Bennett said, still focused on his papers. "Oh. Because it was interrupting the class nearly every 2-5 minutes."

"How?" I asked while looking at him confusingly.

He sighed. "Someone has been really trying to get a hold of you. I would've tried turning it off, or maybe putting it on silent, but that would mean violating your property. Putting it in the drawer sound proofed it enough for me to continue on with my teachings without any disturbances."

"Oh," I muttered.

I turned on the phone to check on what he was talking about - _127 messages, and 6 missed calls_. My eyes widened as I cautiously unlocked the phone to check who it was. I unknowingly rolled my eyes when I found out it was none other than _Roger. _I inhaled sharply while skimming and scanning through all the messages he sent me.

_Answer me Simon_

_Stop ignoring me_

_I really need to talk to you!_

_Answer your phoneee_

_I know your phone is on. _

_Fine I'll call_

_Why didn't you answer?!_

I quickly turned off the phone when it all became too overwhelming.

_What does he want? _I thought.

Quickly, I turned back to the saved draft of the message I planned on sending to my mom. I finished it by saying I was leaving with Sierra to visit Emily.

"Simon?" asked Mr. Bennett. "Why are you still here?"

I looked up from my phone. "Oh, I-I I'm sorry. I'll be going now."

I spun around and started running towards the door. Just when I was about to exit, I unexpectedly ran myself into someone's chest. My phone nearly fell out of my hands, _again,_ but I quickly caught it while it was in midair. When I looked up to see who I bumped into, it was Ralph. He smiled and was rubbing the center of his chest.

"We've got to stop meeting like his," he said with a laugh.

I smiled and laughed too. "Sorry Ralph."

"Ralph?" Mr. Bennett called from behind me. "Do you have papers to turn in to me?"

"Yes . Hold on," Ralph said. He quickly took out two sheets of paper from his back pack and started walking towards Mr. Bennett. But then he stopped and turned back to me. "Wait for me outside," he said, then continued walking to Mr. Bennett.

I nodded even when he wasn't looking at me and waited outside the classroom, next to the doorway. A few seconds later, Ralph walked out and started walking with me down the hall.

"So what's up?" he asked.

"Nothing really," I replied. "I'm visiting Emily with Sierra later."

"Oh really? That sounds fun. How is she?"

"Emily?" I shrugged. "I don't know. Her phone got taken away so we haven't been able to contact her. That's why we're visiting her today."

He nodded understandingly. "Right. Well, tell her I hope her parents get well soon."

"I'll be sure to do that," I said. I let a smile spread across my face to hide the confusion that was flowing through my brain. _'Hope her parents get well soon'? What's wrong with her parents?_

We finally made it to the first floor, and out of nowhere, Sierra ran up to me and jumped into a hug.

"Simon where have you been?!" she asked worriedly. "I've been waiting here for 10 minutes!"

I staggered to recover my balance while saying, "At Mr. Bennett's class. He took away my phone at 6th period so I went in to take it back."

Sierra took a step back for me, leaving me room to stand up straight again. "Oh," she sighed in relief. "Why'd he take it in the first place?"

"He caught me using it during class when I accidentally bumped into Ralph and it dropped out of my hands."

I gestured and looked to Ralph but was confused to see him focused on Sierra. When I looked back to Sierra, she too focused on him. They both gave each other a death stare.

Sierra inhaled then exhaled sharply. "Ralph," she said in a voice that sounded like a challenge.

"Sierra," Ralph said, using the same tone as Sierra.

I looked at them back and forth and didn't know how to react. "Um," I hummed.

Sierra snapped out of it, then looked back to me with a light scowl which I believe was meant for Hayden. "Sorry," she said. "Anyways, Simon, thank goodness! I was so worried about you!"

I looked at her with confusion. "Why?"

She raised her eyebrows. "You haven't heard?"

I waited for her to say more, but when I realized she actually expected an answer, I shook my head slowly. Sierra shut her eyes tight and brought a hand to her forehead. She inhaled deeply before opening her eyes and dropping her hand to the waist.

"Jack is telling everyone that he's going to beat you up," she said.

_Jack? Who's Jack?_

"Why?" I asked, hiding my confusion.

"He said he saw you and Ralph flirting. I thought he was just starting rumors but," she looked back to Ralph, "I can understand why."

I looked to her with wide eyes then gave out a half-hearted laugh. "W-wait. No..I dont..there's not-"

"There's nothing going on between me and Simon," Ralph finished the sentence for me.

"Really?" Sierra asked suspiciously.

"I swear on my life that there is nothing going on between me and Ralph," I said as assuringly as possible. "He was just apologizing for getting me into trouble. That is the only contact we had today."

"He's right," Ralph said. I swear I heard a tint of hurtness in his voice.

Sierra sighed and crossed her arms. "Whatever but you guys being together now doesn't help your judgement. Simon, we should really get going."

I nodded and looked to Ralph. "Bye," I said. Sierra pulled onto my arm before I could see him wave back to me at all. But even then, I was able to here his words of goodbye over the other sounds of people in the hallway.

"What the hell were you thinking?!" Sierra whispered angrily.

"What?" I said with a blank face. She glared at me then started running forward.

Sierra dragged me across the hallway, leading us to the exit. I struggled to keep up with her sprinting and so many groups of people scattered around. I probably shoved myself into 10 people throughout the whole process.

Once we were near the entrance, we were forced to stop and phase down to walking. A flood of people fought to walk out the door - People shoved into other people, people yelled for others to walk faster, and people threw things across the room just for the hell of it. It definitely wasn't this crowded yesterday.

"Of all days!" Sierra cried over the sounds of other people and threw her hands on he air.

Unluckily, we were way at the back. _Luckily, _we at least had some air room, unlike the people who were squished in the middle.

I didn't think much of it. I blankly looked at the crowd and simply moved when I had the space to (Which was about 5 inches every 10 seconds). I tamed myself to become patient. Meanwhile, Sierra threw out some swear words and joined the people who yelled at other people to walk faster.

Suddenly, I sensed someone staring at me. It was the same stare I felt earlier today. The same fireballs that were being pelted to the back of my head. I looked to my right and saw the same guy who gave me then overwhelming stare in biology today. He leaned against the wall in the middle of 2 other guys, and they all pointed at me. They whispered into each other's ears, and started walking towards me.

What happened next was completely out of control, for even I wasn't aware of the situation.

"Hey Simon!" yelled the red-haired boy. He looked terrifyingly angry. All of a sudden, I was grabbed by the upper arm and shoved to the nearest locker. I didn't even have time to scream.

"Simon!" screeched Sierra.

My body was facing up and against the lockers. I stood there for a moment then turned around. The red-haired boy stood 3 feet away from me and his hands were fisted so hard I was able to see the blue veins pop up from underneath his skin. His eyes looked darkly at me the same way he did when I walked into the classroom. One side of his lips lifted, but her eyes were still angered.

"Bitch broke the deal," he said.

At this point, everyone who crowded to walk out of the school came back in to crowd around me and the red-haired boy. Some even took out their phones and pointed their cameras at us.

Sierra ran up behind the boy and started pulling at his shoulders. "Jack leave him alone!" she yelled.

_Jack?_

Jack shoved Sierra to the ground and yelled, "Get off me whore!" Sierra slid across the tile floor and nearly hit her neck against a sharp outer corner.

"Sierra!" I cried. I started running up to her, but Jack blocked my path.

"You're not going anywhere you lying bitch," he said between his clenched teeth.

"What?" I muttered.

He pushed my chest with his pointing finger and began backing me up closer to the wall. "We made a deal," he growled. "You made a promise not to have anything to do with Ralph, and you broke it!"

I was speechless. Sierra finally stood up and yelled, "That was just a misunderstanding!"

"SHUT IT!" Jack screeched while turning his head towards Sierra. Then he turned back to me and I could see all the details of his anger shown across his face. He breathed out a laugh. "You're gonna pay for it."

"Wait-" I started to say but it was too late. Jack grabbed me by the shoulders and shoved me to the ground. My shirt rolled up and my skin was exposed to the tile floor where it burned tremendously as I slid roughly across it. Before my mind refocused on what was going on, the only thing I saw was Jack in the air, ready to pounce on me.

The next few minutes were a blur. However, the pain wasn't. In fact, it was clear as glass. After multiple punches, it didn't matter where the pain was located because pain was all I sensed. I never had time to open my eyes and see everything that was going on. But based on what I already felt, it seemed that it was best I didn't.

I didn't know how long the pain was going to last. I thought it was going to last forever. Eternally. And it was for a moment. Because despite the fact I was being half-killed, it came to the point where the pain was painless. It wasn't that I got used to it, but that it almost didn't compare to what I felt when I drowned.

They say that before you die, your whole life flashes before your eyes. For some reason I actually hoped for it to. At the same time, I expected the opposite because logically, I couldn't remember anything. But that wasn't the case.

People's whole life flash before their eyes, even when they don't remember the half of it. I didn't remember 99.9999% of mines. Yet, something did flash before my eyes.

But just as I heard the yellings of Ralph's voice in the background, I blacked out before I could finish it.

•••••••••••••

"Simon.. Simon.." my name echoed in my ears.

My eyes were closed, but I was able to see the bright light peeping through.. and it burned. My eyes slowly fluttered open, enduring the burning pain it brought to my pupils.

Something wrapped around me before my eyes were able to refocus. I heard sobbing's and sniffles by my neck, and a warm body leaned against me.

Finally, my eyesight became clear. I looked around and found myself in the nurse's room. Blue curtains surrounded my bed, and I was enclosed in a very tiny space.

When the person who was hugging me pulled back, I found that it was Sierra. Her face became a river as all her tears rushed down her cheeks uncontrollably.

"Si-mon," She managed to sob out while resting her head on my shoulder.

"Sierra," I said in a frightening raspy voice. I was starting to get some deja vu from when I woke up to Roger in the hospital.

"You- You're," Sierra struggled to find words as she sobbed greatly. "Ral-Ralph c-came. He..He punched Ja- Jack and..and..you were...you were-"

"Shhh.." I shushed her as calmly as I could. When I thought to rub her back, my arm was exposed to a sharp pain and I resisted. Any body part that moved was exposed to sharp pain.

I tried to reframe what happened. But when I did, a lump started to form in my throat.

I couldn't cry. Not with Sierra already crying. I had to be supportive of her.

I stayed still with Sierra crying on my shoulder. I became reminiscent while staring blankly at the ceiling. For some reason, my mind felt clear. It felt...thoughtful. I was confused as to why, and I was filled with wonder.

Just when I was about to figure out why, I drifted off again.

•••••••••••

I woke up to near darkness. I expected to wake up next to Sierra again, but I didn't. This time I was in a different room, and on a king mattress bed. I slowly sat up as the faded soreness still stuck to my body. But it was now bearable for me to move around without screaming in agony. A small lamp litted up a corner of the room, but it was enough to look around.

I was most definitely not in my room. _Where am I? _I asked myself.

Suddenly, I heard a snore to the left of me and nearly jumped. I turned to my left, but wasn't able to make out anything due to the darkness. I squinted my eyes and looked a little harder. This time, I saw something; someone, sleeping. I leaned closer, when finally, I was able to make out the shadows and linings of the body.

I gasped lightly when I found out who it was.

Roger.

Roger sat on the floor with his head laying on the bed. He slept soundly, and his small breaths were the only sounds to fill he room.

I covered my mouth when an idea came to my head. _Am I in Roger's bedroom?! What am I doing here? _I wasn't completely sure my theory was correct, but I was getting out of there either way.

Slowly, I swung my legs over to the side of the bed, and stood up on the wooden ground. My legs were dazed and I immediately became lightheaded, but I managed to stand up straight. I struggled to keep myself steady as I started walking towards the doorway which was right across from the bed. Tiptoeing, I checked Roger every few steps to make sure he wasn't awake.

Finally, I opened the bedroom door and cringed to the loud squeaking sound of the hinges as the door swung open. I quickly checked Roger. When I saw that he was still sleeping, I found myself walking through the hallway and down the stairs. If this truly was Roger's house, I grateful that it wasn't as complex as my own. I was even more grateful that his family left most of the lights on to make my way around.

I easily found my way to the front door. Rushed yet cautiously, I turned the round knob, and pulled it open. I opened it enough to see the darkness of night.

My heart went through a thrilling heart attack when out of nowhere, an arm came around me and pushed against the door, shutting it closed once again. My eyes widened, and I slowly spun my head around. The face I met was angered. His eyebrows were furrowed and his lips firmed up, causing his nose to scrunge lightly.

I stared at him blankly, and opened my mouth without knowing what to say. "Roger I.. I was just..You were sleeping and..I didn't-"

Roger slammed against me and wrapped his arms tightly around my body. My mind became lost to the situation, and I remained still. His chin rested on my shoulder, and he nestled his face to the crook of my neck.

What came next was out of my train of thought. It was something I didn't know how to handle so I stood there, speechless.

Roger cried.

His sniffles filled my ears, and he sobbed. It wasn't uncontrollable like Sierra's, but it was like he was finally letting everything out. His arms wrapped tighter around me, as if he didn't care whether I would be suffocated or not.

But even I didn't care because, even when I didn't want to, I wrapped my arms around him, and I cried too.


	8. Endless Tears

Chapter 8 - Simon

I don't know how long we embraced in each other's arms. I took the time to cry out my feelings to him as he did to me. But we soon had to let go.

Roger didn't talk much. He offered to make me coffee as I sat on his living room couch with a brown blanket wrapped warmly around me. I knew I was a mess. My hair looked like it hadn't been brushed for weeks, my eyes felt weighed down by the dark bags underneath them, and I dressed in a white tank top with crimson red sweats that Roger let me borrow. I was a tad embarrassed by my disgusting appearance, but Roger showed no judgement

When Roger came back with a cup of coffee, he asked if I wanted to add any creamer. I denied the offer and drank the scorching hot coffee all at once. I was satisfied to feel my stomach burst with warmth, despite the fact that my tongue became numb from being burnt. My eyes were suddenly more awake.

Roger stared at me, concentratedly, as I drank. I can't say it bothered me. I was too distracted by the pleasurable warmth of the coffee to even care.

I was surprised by how fast I drank it and how thirsty I had been. But once the mug was empty, I set it on a glass coffee table. I curled myself into a ball on the couch and wrapped the blanket all around me to savor the warmth. I felt like a fluffy chew toy.

My eyes wandered to Roger's as he stared at me. In my head, I hoped he would gain uncomfortable and look away. But he didn't. And neither did I. It wasn't a contest on who could stare at each other the longest or who would blink first. It was simply just a moment to stare deeply into each other's eyes.

I thought it was going to last forever until finally, Robbie spoke.

"Are you still hurt?" he asked.

I shifted on the couch before answering, "I'm sore all over but it's bearable."

He didn't respond. He stared at me but not directly in the eye.

I looked to the side. "What happened?" I asked, terrified.

Roger was quiet at first. "Why didn't you answer your phone?" he asked, ignoring my question.

"What?" My head turned to him.

He scowled. "I texted you," he said angrily. "Over a hundred times. And I called you half as much. So why didn't you answer."

"I.." I was lost for words. "It got.. Mr. Bennett took it."

"Why.."

"He caught me using it during class and-"

"_HOW _did he caught you?" Roger's voice rose.

I opened my mouth, closed it, then opened it again. "Ralph bumped-"

Roger slammed his fist onto the glass coffee table and furiously stood up. I looked to him with wide eyes.

"Goddammit Simon!" he yelled and started pacing while ruffling his hands into his hair.

I suddenly became cautious of his family inside the house, probably already sleeping. "What is your problem?" I whispered angrily.

Roger stopped and pointed to me. "You. You're my problem."

"What did I do?"

"Everything! I don't go to school for one day, and you nearly get beaten to death. And when I try to contact you multiple times after someone texted me that my boyfriend was about to be Jack's new punching bag, you don't answer. Why? Because your phone got taken away. Why? Because of Ralph!"

"It was an accident!" I yelled back. I no longer cared about waking his family.

"And look where that got you." Robbie gestured towards my aching body, and the bruises that covered almost half my face.

Before I knew it, tears started pouring down my face. I tried holding it in but that just made my face want to explode. My vision started to blur from all the tears that piled up on my eyes. But they were clear enough to see Roger looking at me apologetically.

Without thinking, I stood up from the couch and began walking towards the front door while wiping away the tears.

"Wait," I heard Roger say. "Simon wait."

I continued walking. I didn't want to see him. I didn't want to talk to him.

When I first woke up on that hospital bed 2 weeks ago, I thought everything would be fine. I thought, _You'll get through this. No one will have to know that you don't remember anything. You'll be fine. _I cried because I knew that was a lie. All this. This wasn't worth all of it. I didn't ask to be assaulted. To be held captive. Any of it.

I finally made it to the door and opened it. But just like every other time, Roger stopped me. He slid in front of the door and slammed it shut.

"Where do you think you're going?" he asked.

I glared at him. "I want to go home."

"You can't go home."

"And why not?!"

"Because your mom doesn't know! She doesn't know what Jack did to you or that you're being cared for here."

I looked at him, shocked. "Why?! Why wouldn't you tell my MOTHER about this?"

I used all my willpower to push him out of the way but he was stronger. Robbie grabbed me by the upper arm and rid me of any way of defending myself.

"Because she doesn't know about your amnesia! And any questions she would've asked would lead to you having to admit it to her!" he yelled.

I became silent.

Roger looked down to his feet and inhaled deeply. "I never once broke a promise." he shook his head then looked up at me. "And Simon, I promised you I wouldn't tell anyone. Didn't I?"

My mind was blank. I didn't know what to say or how to respond. Instead, I gulped and said, "I can't."

Roger looked at me confused. "Can't what?"

I bit my lip to keep it from quivering and shook my head. Roger released my arm and backed up an inch. He remained still for a while then he took my hand and started pulling me back towards the living room. I didn't resist. He sat me on the couch and crouched before me so I was able to look at him.

He concentrated on my face before saying, "Please speak to me."

I tucked in my lips and wiped my eyes as the tears started to run back. We were silent for about a minute, but Roger was patient and waited for me to answer.

Finally I took a deep breath and said, "I can't live my life not knowing." I paused for a moment and sniffed. "I can't spend the rest of my life not remembering, and relying on you to help me when things get confusing. People don't realize how important it is to have memories. Even when I don't remember, I still miss them." A single tear dropped from my eye and I laughed half-heartedly while wiping it away. "I want to remember. I want to remember all the happy moments I spent and even all the bad ones because they are what add up to me. But... I can't do that alone."

Roger shook his head and took both of my hands. "But you're not alone. I'm here for you, Simon. I've always been. We could make a fresh start."

I looked down to my thighs and two more tears fell. "You don't understand. I want to remember _everything. _Even before the times you and I met."

"And we'll find a way to do that," Roger said a bit rushed.

"No," I said while shaking my head. "Just like you said, look at where this all got me. I thought I could take advantage of a fresh start. " A lump in my throat made it harder for me to talk. "But I guess I was just kidding myself."

Out of my own will, I started crying again. It was the kind that felt like heavy hiccups and made it frustratingly difficult to talk. _Why am I such a cry baby?_

Roger let me cry. He sat himself next to me and started comforting me by rubbing my back.

I cried for nearly a minute before I was finally able to gain control over it and stop. Roger stopped rubbing my back and place his hand over my knee.

"So what do you want to do?" he asked.

I took a moment to wipe away all my tears and sniffed before turning my head towards him. "I want to tell my mom. I want her to know everything that's been going on and no more secrets."

Roger took a moment to think and he sighed. "I'll follow whatever decision you choose to make."

I nodded and smiled at him. "Thank you," I said in a raspy voice. I cleared my throat from all the snot that probably ran down it.

Roger scooted closer to me. "Come here," he said, and wrapped his muscular arms securely around me. I made myself comfortable and rested my head against his chest and he reacted by resting his head on my head. He took a breath and inhaled my scent before saying, "I know you don't love me the same way you did before the amnesia hit you. But just know, I'm never going to stop caring for you."

We stayed like that for a few seconds until finally, I asked, "Roger? What happened after I blacked out in school?"

Roger shrugged. "You were taken to the nurse's office and Jack got expelled. I came later and told them I would take you home. Later, your mom called angrily for you not telling her where you went. I told her you left your phone in my bag and that's why you weren't able to to talk to her. She calmed down after a while and now thinks you're staying over at Sierra's house for a science project. She'll probably still confront you once you get back but she doesn't know about the incident."

"Oh," I said quietly. "Is that it? I swear I heard Ralph's voice before I became unconscious."

I felt Roger's head shake on top of mine. "That's it."

"Okay," I muttered.

I pretended to believe that what he just said was true. But if it was, why did his hands fist as his grip on me suddenly become much tighter?


	9. Goodbye

**A/N: This chapter is Roger's perspective on the day Tessa beat up Dawn.**

Chapter 9 - Roger

_He doesn't love me anymore, _I thought, _Simon.. doesn't love me anymore._

The same twisted thought circled through my head for hours on end, and I spent nearly the whole night thinking things over. There really wasn't much I could do. Doing homework was no option if I wasn't able to keep my mind straight.

I looked to the clock. 7:00 AM. I was supposed to be ready 10 minutes ago. Yet, here I was, laying lifelessly on my bed, lost in all thoughts.

I heard a knock on my bedroom door. "Roger?" I heard my sister, Camilla, call from outside. "Roger wake up."

I moaned while turning in my bed and slapped a pillow over my head to drown out any sounds.

"You're going to be late for school!" I heard Camilla's voice muffle through the pillow. _Damn it._

"I'm not going to school," I yelled back with a pillow still over my head.

"What do you mean you're not going?"

I stayed silent.

"Ugh," Camilla grunted. "You know you're becoming a lot more like your old self again."

I gripped onto my sheets and threw the pillow off my head. "Don't fucking say that and get out!"

"Get out of what!?" Camilla yelled back. "It's not like you ever let anyone in."

I heard the sounds of Camilla's footsteps trail away and I slammed my fist against the mattress. _I am not who I was before_, I thought, _And I will never be, ever, again. _

I threw my blanket over my body and closed my eyes to make up for all the lost time I didn't sleep.

I woke up to the annoying sounds of vibration rattling against my metal desk. I ignored it for a moment, but as it continuously began to vibrate I couldn't tolerate it.

_Fucking._

I rolled off from my bed and slouched my way over to the desk. I ruffled my hand through the tangled pieces of hair at the back of my head as I picked up my phone. My eyes were nearly blinded by the full brightness of the phone's screen but after a while my vision cleared.

_13 messages. _Great_._

I unlocked my phone and saw that they were all from my friend Bill. I scrolled from bottom to top and skimmed through all his messages.

_DUDE GET THE FUCK UP. _

_You're probably sleeping aren't you._

_Answer your damn phone!_

_I'm not playing with you Roger_

_phone_

_goddamn_

_your_

_answer_

_Unless you want your Simon to get beat up_

_BRO LOOK AT YOUR PHONE_

_The fuck are you not answering_

_Why aren't you in school?_

Finally, I made it to the top.

_Dude._ _Words spreading that Simon and Ralph were seen together. Jack is planning to beat up your bf after school._

For a minute I froze. I had to re read the words _Simon, Ralph, together, Jack, _and _beat up _to finally understand what Bill meant.

I reacted immediately. I sprinted out of my bedroom and down to the kitchen floor. Still holding my phone in my hand, I rushed to find my keys. They were no where to be found. I started cussing countless times until I found a yellow note lying on the counter.

I picked it up and read: _Roger, I took your car. -Camilla_

Without even know it, I crumpled up the yellow piece of paper and threw it on the ground. I stomped to the living room and began pacing back and forth, not knowing what to do. Finally, I dropped myself onto the couch and pulled up Simon's number from my contacts list.

I didn't care about auto correct. I began furiously typing and said, _Simon, getthe hell out of shool. go home. idc where you go, just keave schol grounds immediately._

Send.

It felt like an hour since I started texting Simon. After 72 text messages, I began calling him. I don't know how many times but after multiple times he didn't answer, I went back to texting.

I didn't know how to react. All I knew that I was more worried than angered. Even with that being said, I was still angry.

_Why would Simon hang with that son of a bitch, _I thought, _After everything he's done, why?_

Then I reminded myself of his memory loss and suddenly forgave him. But I didn't forgive Ralph. I will never, ever, forgive Ralph.

It was already 1:54 PM, almost the end of the school. I looked outside and saw rain pouring down hysterically. I took a second to make a choice. Once I did, I grabbed my coat and began running out of the house. What's the point of legs if you can't even run to save your boyfriend?

Once I got to school, I was barely able to make it through to the entrance. Police cars came in from every direction and police man all crowded up in one area in front of the school. There were crowds of student surrounding them and taking pictures just for the hell of it. As I got closer, I saw the policeman's hastling someone. With dark eyes and red hair, it was Jack.

I began running up to him. When policeman saw me, they shook their heads and started pushing me back.

"Sorry son," said one. "This zone is restricted."

I ignored him and began pushing my way through. I could feel the grips of policeman's on my arm, trying to pull me back. But my willpower was stronger.

"Hey get back here!" someone yelled.

_Like hell._

I finally made it to the center where 4 policeman fought to keep Jack in control. Without thinking, I pushed the policemen out of the way and punched Jack roughly on the face.

"AAAOOWWAH" he screeched.

Two police man grabbed both of my arms and kicked me by the knee so I'd kneel down. It was surprisingly painless.

I glared at Jack. "What did you do with Simon!?"

He gestured towards himself. "HEY I didn't do shit!"

Two other policeman came to grab his arms and started pulling him down to the ground, just like where I was.

"Get the fuck off me!" he yelled demandingly.

I started pulling myself off from the ground. "Sir," said one policeman. "Sir get down on the ground."

I shook my head and walked up to Jack. I grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and yanked him up off the ground. I dropped my mouth to his ears and whispered, "You better fucking get what you deserve because Ralph is definitely not it."

He immediately started screaming and began thrashing his sharp nails at my face. I quickly pulled away and walked out from the crowd.

A policeman grabbed me by the upper arm and said, "Okay son you have to go."

I shrugged it off. "Just about to," I muttered.

I pushed myself through all the people even when many backed away to form a path for me. I can't even imagine the expression planted onto my face. There was no telling how terrifyingly angry I looked, but at least now, no one dared to stop me.

Suddenly I heard screams from all over. I turned around and saw Jack leaning helplessly against a policeman.

"Oh my god," I heard someone say. "Did he just get tazed?"

I let it slide and walked up to the school entrance where a policeman stood guard. He pointed his numb-chuck to my stomach and pushed me back. "Cant go in there son," he said. "Restricted."

"I have to get to my boyfriend," I attempted to say calmly.

He shook his head. "Sorry. Family only."

"I'm here in orders from his mom," I lied. "She needs to know if he's okay. Please. She's worried_._"

The policeman looked around then back to me and sighed. He took a step aside from the door and said, "Alright. Go on right ahead. But dont-"

I speeded myself inside before he could even finish his sentence. It was a no brainer that Simon would be held in the nurses office due to his possible injuries. I walked into the school's office and went through the little hallways until finally I found the nurses office.

My heart had accelerated so greatly compared to when I was at home. For a second it calmed.

Then when I opened the door to the nurses room, there I saw, Simon laying almost lifelessly on a bed with a worried Ralph leaning over him. I stood frozen and shocked as Ralph lowered his head to his and lightly kissed him on the forehead.

Out of fury, I slammed the door shut behind me. Ralph nearly jumped and stood completely straight as he looked at me with wide eyes.

I scowled at him roughly. "Get... the hell... away from him."

Ralph held up his hands in defense and started backing away from Simon. "Hey man. I'm sorry. I didn't-"

I speed walked over to him and pushed him against the wall. I saw the sharp look on his face when his back hit straight to the wall, along with his head. As he recovered from the pain I walked up to him and grabbed his shirt.

"Don't you dare touch him," I whispered angrily.

"Dude it wasn't like that!" Ralph yelled defensively as he pushed his head off the wall. I pushed his head back and he winced with a grunt.

"Nonetheless you had no right to touch him!" I yelled back. "He's mine!"

"Don't you think I know that already?! You don't just simply ignore the guy your ex left you for."

"Don't try to outsmart me. Because that's the point. He left _you _for _me. _So you don't kiss him, you don't touch him, and so help me don't even lay a breath on him."

"Are you fucking-"

I pulled his shirt and threw him to the ground. His neck nearly got shot by the sharp edge of a table. He rubbed his hands against his head as it smacked hard against the tile ground. I leaned over his body and glared.

"Stay away from Simon," I growled.

Ralph took a minute to recover when by my surprise, the right side of his lips lifted. He was grinning.

"I did. But then how is it that you were the one to stay away when I was the one to be there for him when he was attacked?"

I slammed by foot against his stomach, ignoring the little drips of blood that spurted out from his mouth.

**A/N: The true Roger has been revealed! bye **


	10. Here We Go Again

Chapter 10 - Roger

**A/N: This chapter is Roger's perspective on the day Jack beat up Simon**. **(continued from the last chapter)**

I stared menacingly at Ralph as his almost dead body lied in a puddle of blood. I didnt care to think of how I was going to manage when or if someone saw him, but anger was still in control and it didnt matter to me. Ralph had already fainted and that was all that satisfied me.

I started walking over to Simon. His body laid on a hospital bed and he was tied to machines with tubes dug into his skin. Bruises covered most of his face and it made it almost unbearable to simply look at him. But not once did I turn away.

I caressed the bottom of his cheek to his jawline, and rested my neck into the crook of her neck while sitting on a chair beside the bed. I inhaled his scent. It had become a habit of mine, even when Simon didnt have much of a scent. He smelled fresh and clear, like the soft wind that brushes against your face and clears your lungs when you breathe. Just as it was clear, it heavily cleared my mind at stress.

I could feel Simon's pulse pumping through his chest and neck and it made me feel relieved.

_He's still alive,_ I thought as the monitor above him beeped at the pace of his heart.

I was unaware of me falling asleep until the sound of Simon's heart beat starting to accelerate woke me up. I opened my eyes to find myself laying my head against his stomach and feeling it move through the heavy oxygen intakes I heard as he started breathing heavily. The monitor started beating rapidly and I quickly sat up straight. My body jerked, not knowing what to do.

Luckily, by then, a nurse had already started running into the room. When she saw me, she scowled.

"Get out," she ordered while pointing to the door.

I stood up quickly and rushed in front of her. "Please, what's going on?" My voice sounded crackled and I too was breathing heavily as Simon.

"Who are you?"

"I-I'm Simon's boyfriend," I replied quickly yet panicked. "PLEASE tell me what's going on!"

The nurse shook her head and started pushing me out the door. "Sir you have to leave."

"But.."

Two other nurses jogged in. Once went to Simon's side and the other, who was a man, stopped in front of me.

"Who is this?" He asked the nurse who I was already talking to.

"I'm Simon's boyfriend," I replied in an annoyed tone. "Now will someone please explain to me what's-"

The nurse placed a hand on my shoulder. "You're boyfriend will be alright. But right now, you must leave."

He started pushing me out the door and this time I didnt resist. Just when he was about to shut the door in my face, I quickly yelled, "Please take care-" then a sharp yet small wind aired to my face as the nurse cut me off with a door slam.

I sat myself on a wooden chair next to the room, barely hearing the near-silent sounds of Simon's monitor beeping rapidly.

It took me a while to realize that I didnt see Ralph's body lying on the floor, and not even a trace of blood was left to prove that he was there.

It had been nearly an hour since the nurses kicked me out of the room.

Finally, the male nurse opened the door and I stood up before he stepped out. I looked at him attentively as he looked at me.

"Roger, is it?" he asked.

I nodded slowly.

He smiled lightly. "We'll give you a few minutes with Simon before we continue with his medications."

"Is he alright?"

He stepped aside the door and gestured into the room. "Go see for yourself." Him and the other two nurses started walking themselves out and left the door wide open.

I eagerly took the nurse's request and walked myself inside the room while closing the door behind me. I faced the door, afraid of seeing what I was about to see. I closed my eyes and inhaled.

"Roger?" I heard a gentle voice say.

My eyes widened and I turned around. Simon's bed was slightly elevated so he was basically sitting up. He looked at me. His eyes filled with all the wonder in the world and they glowed in the light... and he was beautiful.

"Simon," I breathed.

**A/N: Sorry for not updating in such a long time despite how short this was. But before you ask something like, "Wait, Simon was awake here but doesn't remember anything after he blacked out? what?" You shall find out in the next chapter. Glad and hope you're enjoying this book! :**)


	11. 3 Wishes

**A/N: this is a continuation of chapter 10 but now in Simon's perspective. Some people have been confused but this is a flashback before she woke up in Roger's house.**

"Simon," Roger breathed.

He ran over next to me and wrapped both his arms tightly around my body. His fingers pressed on a sensitive spot and I winced.

"Roger, your hurting me," I say.

Roger doesn't let go. He only holds me tighter which I thought wasn't possible. I almost became angry but then I heard him sniff.

He sniffed again.

He was sobbing.

I smiled and endured the pain as I wrapped an arm around him in return.

"Roger.." I said sincerely.

Roger tucked his chin and buried his face into my shoulder. I didn't care that he was staining my clothes. Because this was a side of him I had never seen.

We stayed that way for what seemed like forever, and for a while I actually wished it was forever. But Roger soon pulled away and placed his hands on my shoulder while dropping his forehead to mine.

His cheeks were red and his eyes were shut closed as if deep in thought. His chest rose constantly and his mouth remained open as his breathing heaved. Two tears sat on his cheek and another tear was coming its way.

For a while, I had no intentions of doing anything. But then my hand gently placed itself around the back of Roger's neck. I smiled even when I knew he couldn't see me.

"Roger," I said quietly.

He inhaled deeply but kept his eyes closed.

"Roger look at me," I said more assuringly.

His face tensed, but then it softened. He slowly opened his eyes and he looked at me... I mean he really looked me.

Then he smiled. "Simon," he said quietly.

"I'm here," I said.

Roger breathed out a laugh. "Yes you are."

He hesitated, but soon his face came closer. I wasn't aware of how close he was getting until his lips barely touched mine.

Immediately, I pushed against his shoulder and flailed my back onto the bed. Roger pulled away and stared at me with wide eyes. I returned the stare. Soon his face saddened and I looked away, not wanting to look at his hurt face.

"I'm sorry," I said.

Roger was quiet. I didn't know whether I should hug him or give words of support. but then he inhaled and asked, "You know how a genie can grant you 3 wishes?"

I turned my head back to him, but he was already facing away. I didn't respond.

"Well," he continued, "I've always wondered what I would wish for. I thought from education to winning a million dollar lottery, but I never really came up with a significant wish." He looked down to the ground. "I think it's because... I was already happy with the life I had. The life with you." He turned his head back to me and took my hand in his. "Do you know what I wish for right now?"

I was still for a second but then I shook my head.

A tear fell from his eyes. "That you would remember." His voice cracked.

My breathing stopped. Roger rushed to my side and kissed me with all the passion in the world. His tears fell from his to my cheek and his hand cupped my left cheek.

And this time... I didn't push away.

I kissed him back. I kissed him with unconditional love as he did with me and I didn't even know why. My heart felt rushed, and my mind felt scattered.

I didn't want to stop. I didn't want it to end.

Roger's tongue licked at my bottom lips, and without even realizing it, I opened my mouth and let his tongue slide right past my teeth. Right now, he was in power. I felt vulnerable, yet stronger.

He forced himself on top of me, taking advantage of the little spots his legs were able to rest on. Knowing of my injuries, his arms lied on both sides of my face as he attempted to keep his weight from crushing me. He straddled his legs so his knees were next to mines, and his chest was so close to mine.

Suddenly, his pocket began to buzz. Roger ignored and continued to kiss me.

In between kisses, I said, "Roger...your phone.."

"It can wait," he said quickly and went back to kissing, ignoring the vibration coming from his back pocket.

It was as if our lips were magnets. Every time we pulled away, we immediately stuck back together.

Then we heard a knock on the door. As if we had the same minds, I pushed Roger off the bed as he rushed to pull away and sit on the s

Two nurses, a male and a woman, walked into the room with a box filled with liquids unknown to my knowledge. The woman smiled at me and laid the box on a desk at the far corner and started walking towards me while readjusting the rubber gloves on her hands.

"Hello Simon," she said. "I'm Nurse Payton."

"Hi," I say a bit awkwardly.

Roger slouched in his chair and rubbed his lips while trying to avoid eye contact with anyone else.

"So," she said, "About your injuries, it would seem that you need stitches in multiple different places."

"Stitches?" I asked a bit fearfully.

"Yes. Jack hurt you real bad didn't he?" Nurse Payton sighed. "But don't worry. You wont even have to feel a thing."

"That's right," said the male nurse. "We'll be injecting an anesthetic into your body so the pain wont be visible to your nervous system."

"However," said Nurse Payton, "There is a little bit of a downside."

"What is it?" I asked worriedly.

"The stitching will nearly take a process of a little over an hour. This anesthetic was designed to act as a sleeping pill and will take away the memories of your past 2 or so hours."

"So whatever happened between you two just now will be forgotten," added the male nurse while gesturing between me and Roger.

My eyes widened and my head spun towards Roger. Our minds thought similarly and he was already facing me before I faced him. His eyes were just as big as mines, and none of us knew how to react.

"I do hope that whatever it was, it would be easy to explain after the anesthetic wears off," said Nurse Payton.

The male nurse walked over to Roger and placed a hand on his shoulder. "I'm afraid you have to go son."

"Wait-" Roger said.

The phone on the desk started to ring. Nurse Payton answered it and after a few seconds reached it out to the other nurse.

"Harrison, its for you," she said.

He sighed and took the phone from out of her hands. "Hello?"

At that moment, Roger looked to me and placed a finger over his mouth. I gave him a confused look as he slowly tiptoed over to the nurses' container and dug his hand into it.

"Roger!" I tried to whisper loudly yet quietly as possible.

Either he didn't hear me or he was ignoring me. He searched for something and finally pulled out a needle.

_What the hell is he doing?_

He quickly tiptoed back to his chair and he hid the needle behind his back.

By the time he did, Nurse Harrison hung up the phone and turned back to me.

"Sorry for the interruption," he said. He walked back over to Robbie and said, "Like I said, you have to leave now."

"Harrison?" said Nurse Payton while leaning over the medical container. "Where's the needle?"

Harrison turned around and stared at Nurse Payton suspiciously. "Is it not in the container?" he asked.

"Not from what I can see."

Nurse Harrison approached the container and puckered his lips when he realized that the needle wasn't in it.

"Odd," he said. "I swear I dropped it in there. Simon, we'll be right back. Just stay here."

Both nurses walked out of the room and left me and Roger alone in the room once again. Roger sighed in relief.

"Roger, what the hell?!" I said angrily.

He didn't respond. He quickly opened the window and threw the needle out into the concrete ground. Although I couldn't see it happen, I heard the sound of loud shattering as the glass of the needle hit the ground and broke into a million pieces.

I was speechless.

Roger closed the window and went back to me. He took my hands in his and looked at me, intensely.

"Are you strong enough to stand?" he asked demandingly rather than sincerely.

"What? No!" I replied. "Why on earth did you just do that? You violated school property!"

"No time to explain. Please, just leave with me."

"What about my stitches?"

"My father's a doctor. He can do it for you."

"Roger, stop!" I try pulling my hand away from him. "Just let go of my hand."

"Please, just come with me." He sounded as if he was about to cry.

"Not until you explain to me."

No respond.

"Roger, answer me," I say more demandingly.

Still no respond.

"Roger!-"

"I can't let you forget what happened!" Roger yelled.

I stopped and flinched. eat beside my bed.

It was silent for a while. Only the sound of the clock's second hand ticking by every second that passed filled my ears.

Tick.

Tock.

Tick.

Tock.

Tick.

"What are you-" I start to say.

"Simon, I can't live like this!" He spoke over my words and kicked his chair to the floor.

I jumped. My heart was beating as fast as a hummingbird's wings.

Roger started pacing around while ruffling his hands into his hair. It took a while for me to realize how afraid I was of him just now.

"Please.." I say quietly. "Just...Roger, speak to me. I'm here."

"No you're not," He said. His body sharply turned to face me. "You're here physically, but not mentally. And I can't. _live_. with you like that."

My mouth opened for a second but then it closed again.

Roger inhaled deeply. "You don't know what it's like... to love someone but have them not return your feelings."

"I can't control my memory," I say defensively.

"This was even before you lost your memory!" He yelled. "Before we dated.. You hated me. You hated me for loving you so much. You hated the idea of love so you ignored my feelings and threw them back at me."

_What..?_

"And you know what's worse?" He continued. "That despite your hatred, I still loved you. I loved you for 3 years and that still hasn't weakened."

"Roger, just give me-"

"When you finally accepted my feelings for you..." Roger's voice quieted. "...I can't even explain how happy I was. I tried to keep my cool, but trust me, inside I was screaming." His eyes started to water. "Then when I found out about your amnesia.. I didn't know what to think... I thought of it as like a dream. A nightmare. It felt so... unreal."

My throat started to feel heavy, and I felt the want to cry.

"Then when we kissed," Roger finally lifted his eyes to me. He took a moment to really look at me as a tear fell from his eyes. "I was reminded of how very real this was. I was reminded of how much I needed you. And Simon, if you can't remember the past, I want you to at least remember this."

I struggled to speak. My voice crackled, but I managed to say, "Roger I can't-"

Roger quickly leaned over me and placed his lips over mine. I tasted all the tears that fell from his eyes as they fell onto my cheeks and slid down to my lips. I kissed him back. Slowly yet very noticeably, I felt my heart start to flutter at the very presence of him just being here, this close. For once, I actually wanted him more.

But just as I couldn't get enough of him, a sharp pain electrocuted down my back and I started screaming. The monitor on my screen started beeping tremendously fast, and Roger quickly pushed himself off me.

"Simon!" he cried.

ROGER'S POV:

The same two nurses ran in with another container and before I knew it, I was pushed out of the room. I didn't even have time to yell until after the door was slammed in my face. I slammed my fist against the small window of the door.

What my eyes saw terrified me.

Simon's body tensed on the bed, and her eyes were wide open, and almost lifeless.

I slammed my fist even harder against the door. "Simon!" I yelled.

Nurse Payton saw me through the window and walked over to close the curtain.

_No, _I thought.

And just a second before the curtain spreaded across the window, I saw nurse Harrison shoot the needle filled with anesthetic through Simon's arm.

It was already too late.

**A/N: Haven't updated this in forever so I feel like you guys are confused. Basically, after Simon got beat up by Jack, he went to the nurse's office. During her time there, she woke up and had a connection with Roger. sadly, the nurses shot him with an anesthetic that gave her memory loss from the past few hours so now he doesn't remember what happened. the end... until the next chapter. ;)**


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